Spiritual Things Matter

Teach us Delight in simple things. ~ Rudyard Kipling

Yesterday, I wanted to bring some colors into my garden so they could reflect this wonderful spring weather that we are experiencing here right now. Right after dropping my children off at school, I went to the store to carefully pick out some flowers and plants. I was pleased with my Roses, Azaleas, and other plants and flowers that I found. I proceeded to check out when someone drew my attention to an area where they had plants for fifty percent off. I walked over to see if they had anything of interest, when I saw that many of these plants were just tossed on top of each other. It was sad!

I looked through the piles and noticed that many of the flowers were dead. I kept looking through them and found Violets that had one beautiful blossom while everything else in that same little pot appeared completely dead. I saw Dianthus that no one would want because almost everything had withered and turned brown due to lack of nurture and care. Pansies of all different colors were barley recognizable as they were buried on top of each other. I wished I could have taken them all home with me to rescue them from such a harsh place. I settled for about twenty of them and chose the ones that still had potential and beauty to give.

As I arrived home, I carefully pulled all my new plants and flowers out of my vehicle. I was eager to get started in replanting them into their new home. Carefully, I chose a new spot for each flower and each plant. I decided to have the little flowers that were tossed away, closest to my front door. I want to keep a close eye on them as they gain back their strength and begin to recover.

I pulled out my CD player to play some calm, beautiful acoustic guitar and Celtic music. It made planting and working in the garden even more meaningful. My mind began to reflect on the meaning of these little plants that were just rescued from their certain fate.

Though tossed away with carelessness-
as men toil for gain alone.
Their life - that still remained,
became a silent place -
that, with humility - dimly shone.

Walking past - its light,
gently touched my heart,
as I looked with knowingness -
of that which was unseen - yet, I was a part.
It was obvious that so much life
and so much strength -
was still within its means.
Beauty - it is willing to give
to those who would take some time to see.

Basking in contentment and joy, I placed each plant tightly in the rich soil that I could provide for them. I was pleased as I watered them; bringing space so they can stretch their roots deeper and letting them expand into their own expressions. I was pleased as I was reminded one more time how God is ever so willing to provide the richness of His love and care, that we may expand our heart and our minds into ever healthier expressions of His love. With assuredness and peace, we then can touch someone’s heart in return, with tenderness and care, bringing even the smallest healing to them. I am deeply thankful for even His simplest beauty!

What is to give light must endure burning. ~Victor Frankl

The experience of having lived most of my childhood in an orphanage has brought with it many hidden challenges but it has also brought many blessings into my life. The result has been a continual journey to find meaning and truth, which has led me to God.

Recently, I had the privilege of speaking with an elderly man who stated that he thought I had a keen sense of who I am. He recognized strength and independence due to the fact that I have had to take care of myself so much of the time. His kindness almost embarrassed me. However, I also am very aware that in the process of parenting myself, I have sometimes overlooked areas to which I didn’t realize that I should pay attention. Through a sheer stubbornness and will to survive and live, I failed to nurture a very frail area within myself - and that is the fear of rejection. Dealing with that fear and then learning how to let it go has been very hard but has also given me valuable lessons. As a result of this fear, there have been a few times when I have hurt someone that I cared for deeply because, I felt so certain that they would eventually go away as well. That has deeply saddened me.

Another main thing that has been with me ever since I was a very young child is a sense of aloneness. It is a feeling of disconnectedness, of separation and of brokenness. It is as though I have always looked for something and have never been able to find it and yet, I keep looking for it still. As a young woman, living on my own, deep crying periods would often happen, because of this feeling of not belonging and simply being alone in this world. It is a pain that is hard to put into words but as a result, I drew closer to God. Also during this time, I often failed to build solid human relationships, which was just my way of self-protection. Never allowing myself to get into difficult and challenging situations was good on one hand, but it also nursed my feeling of aloneness.

As I started to mature, I began to notice that a strong sensitivity to the feelings of other people had developed in me. Tuning into them, I was often able to even feel their pain. This empathy brought about a sense of righteous indignation when I saw injustice done to others and I began to stand up for those who felt afflicted. Sometimes, unfortunately, I found myself standing totally alone.

A desire has been nurtured in me to help people feel special, no matter their background, educational level or socio-economic status. I realize now that my sense of aloneness wasn’t just because I was an orphan, but that many people suffer silently from this very same feeling in their life. Many people feel trapped in their aloneness and feel that they have nowhere to go. Many have family and loved ones around them, yet still have a sense of isolation and aloneness. They need love, tenderness, compassion and understanding, which must be energized by spiritual commitment for it to be effective. A place of such aloneness is indeed a very difficult and painful place to be.

Love is one of the greatest things we are able to give to others. It is a healer beyond scope. It liberates souls into a space of acceptance and peace as nothing else can do. It brings with it such joy and understanding, and it brings with it a sense of belonging as one is seen and acknowledged by someone.

Too often we busy ourselves with so much activity and we overlook what really matters in life. A kind word, a tender look, a phone call to simply let someone know that you’re thinking of him or her, could mean so much. Perhaps extending an invitation to lunch, then letting them know that you are praying for them, and then, really doing so.

Each and every person has a story to tell and each one of us has endured deep pain in our lives. If we can make that pain a friend and use it to touch the lives around us, then we have grown a little more on our spiritual journey. More importantly, we have brought God to yet - another heart.

That is the true purpose in life!

Is forgiveness needed - as we find our path?
Is the pain imagined?
No – I can’t applaud!
Yes, indeed, all is illusion
but we do live in this world – it’s clear.
Our pain is real to each of us
till we grow beyond that veneer.
Each step we take is experienced
as yet another stage in life.
As we expand our thinking
our hearts will then arrive.

Yes, forgiveness is needed – for ourselves,
since we only see in part.
Forgiveness is needed - for others
to bind our hearts.
Forgiveness is needed
to learn of Love in greater depth.
Forgiveness is needed
as humanity does cry for it.

No greater example -
as our Christ, Lord Jesus King.
As he hung suspended
between heaven, earth and sin,
He cried out - with what strength remained –
Oh God – forgive them, they know not what they do.
Oh God – forgive them,
their blindness and ignorance – let’s undo!
Oh God – forgive them,
I Love them, oh, so very much!
Oh God – forgive them,
as He took His very last gasp.

The earth was dark in silence
as righteous shame was felt.
Our Holy God - just - Gave His Son
To forgive us – yet He still descended - to greater depths.

ALL is forgiven - nothing ever changes that!
ALL is forgiven –
His work is done –

We now can rest!

Viola Jaynes
2007

Be assured that if you knew all, you would pardon all.
– Thomas A. Kempis.

Forgiveness is a gift that has been given to us freely. If we embrace this gift, our lives will forever be changed and our path will have been forever altered. If we still ourselves and enter into our own silence, we will begin to comprehend just what forgiveness really means. It is not for the faint-hearted.

As I contemplate the concept of forgiveness, my mind wanders back many years ago when a close friend deeply hurt me. The hurt that I felt was so profound that I allowed it to turn into anger. As long as I live, I will never forget one night in my bed, feeling this anger manifest as something very dark in my physical body. It was as though angry lightning shot through my every vein and bone. It frightened me and it was that night that I asked God to help me. Never again did I want to allow anger to have such a powerful hold on me. Over time, I was able to forgive this friend as I changed my own perception of things.

It was only recently that my prayer and determination of “never again” was thoroughly tested. The time had come to see if being injured again by a very dear friend, would manifest the fruits that I had desired so many years ago. It was a test that I would have never expected.

As I knelt in prayer and felt the agony and pain of betrayal so intensely again, I heard myself saying to God, “I will only bless and bless again. Only blessings will come from my mouth and only blessings will come through these hands.”

Thus, I’ve managed to work through some deep pain with only a desire in my heart to find healing and peace. The feeling in my heart has been one of love and compassion, knowing that we only understand in part. Feelings of anger and betrayal that I felt so strongly, I turned over to God over and over again. My commitment to what I had promised myself so many years ago was deeply edged into my heart. Love was going to be the only answer. Thus, through forgiveness, I have found my own healing and thus I am convinced that it is forgiveness that becomes our greatest healer.

I have seen in others and myself what anger and unforgiveness can do to a human being. It will only further a victim mentality, only nurse self-pity, and it only keeps a person from following their truest potentials in life. It serves no purpose whatsoever and only robs the person of integrity and their own sense of well being. Most of all, it keeps us from trusting and loving again and thus walls of separation are created between men. The beauty of the human soul is veiled with a dark veil of bitterness.

How much stronger is the power of forgiveness which ultimately is the power of love. To be able to forgive allows one to reclaim their personal power. It frees one of pre-conceived notions of how life should be and how others should treat us. Furthermore, it allows one to let go of grievances, allowing the flow of life’s energy to flow freely and unrestricted through us and to us. Forgiveness brings freedom. The beauty of its expression with its outstretched arms, dismantles fears and doubts.

As we walk on our spiritual path we gain greater understanding of how much we don’t know. Humility does its work deep in our hearts, which will lead to greater wisdom and a deeper understanding of our relationships with others. We are given the realization that each and every person does the best they know to do with the understanding they have at the time. Many of our dealings with others are born out of fear. We all are growing and learning, and we continue to evolve as we seek a spiritual path of excellence.

Love is the greatest manifestation of God on this earth. Our path must be practical for it to be effective. It must start with those who hear a voice echoing within the silence of their own hearts, beckoning to release the power of forgiveness, and to let the manifestation of its love heal our own brokeness, and the broken lives of those around us.