Spiritual Things Matter

Who, being loved, is poor? ~Oscar Wilde

Kal, one of my blogger friends focused his attention today on Blog Action Day and their theme for this year is Poverty. Thanks for posting on this, Kal!

I looked at their site, and I think it is truly a wonderful effort that so many have made in joining together to heighten awareness of the poverty that exists worldwide. If each one of us did our part, whatever that might mean for us, that effort will become part of the solution.

One could write volumes on poverty. It is a dilemma that is painful to come to terms with. It is a fact in our world. Yet, as painful as it is to look poverty in the eyes, it teaches us so much. If only we would not be afraid of it and understand that what we fear out there is that…which we really fear within ourselves.

Poverty can manifest itself in many different ways. The most visible, of course, is the poverty we see when men, women, and children sleep on our streets and under our bridges. When we see beggars holding their hands out for just a little something, we notice the lines on their faces, which only masks their true age. When the mentally ill are left to themselves endangering themselves as well as others, one cries out that humanity would be healed, forever rising above such deprivation. Juvenal, a Roman poet (55 AD-127 AD) once said, “It is not easy for men to rise whose qualities are thwarted by poverty.”

And so it is, when men are hunched over in poverty, they have little strength to stand to see all the possibilities. Benjamin Franklin said, “Poverty often deprives a man of all spirit and virtue; it is hard for an empty bag to stand upright.”

There is another kind of poverty that concerns me just as much as the one that is so readily seen. It is the poverty of the soul. The poverty of the heart. The poverty of the mind. It is a poverty that I see so often and in so many different places. It is a poverty that I have seen within my own heart and soul. It has often deeply troubled me. I work hard to rise above it, each and every day of my life. Mother Teresa said it right when she said, “The most terrible poverty is loneliness, and the feeling of being unloved.”

Growing up in an orphanage from the time I was one and a half years of age until I was fourteen brought an underlying loneliness into my life. Coming to America without speaking a word of English and without being understood by anyone was a loneliness that to this day is difficult for me to explain. I was looking forward to having my own family, but was only met with disappointment because the people that I came to live with were deeply impoverished themselves. Therefore, it only served to drive my loneliness even deeper into my soul. When my brothers were adopted and I was not, it made me doubt my own worth again and again.

It was a feeling of being forgotten and left alone. It was a feeling of not belonging anywhere or to anyone. It was a feeling of being unloved and uncared for, and a feeling of total isolation and abandonment. These were feelings of impoverishment that I have often felt ashamed of in my life. It drove me into further isolation from a world that did not see me. It drove me to protect myself from as much pain as possible. Many times, because of that, I forgot to live life to its fullest. I simply shut life out.

As I have grown older and experienced some healing through the gentleness and graceful mercies of Love, I often notice an orphan mentality in many even though they grew up with parents. Feeling loved as a child is something that many miss out on. Such pain often brings many complexities into the heart and minds of hurting souls. The poverty of love is profoundly painful and drives many to suicides, drugs, alcohol, and criminality. I have experienced, though, that this same poverty of love can also open a window to experience the greatest Love of all. This process can take some time and often many tears are shed during the process.

Poverty! Oh may we find the courage to rise out of our own poverty’s that we may reach out and help heal another hurting heart. The poverty which we have experienced ourselves is the very poverty that has equipped us with compassion to help heal someone else.

This post is part of Blog Action Day 8 - Poverty

^{_{Photograph by: Lionel Bodilis}}
~Teri~

May you find peace in the midst of turmoil today.
May you find comfort in your own tears.
May those tears flow freely with fond memories to pass on.
And may the presence of your beloved always be in your heart.

I pray for you today, that the joys of yesterday will never be forgotten.
That the pains you shared together have created a lasting bond.
That you embrace yourself gently as you tenderly say goodbye,
And that your goodbyes will only be in passing.

May you find comfort in the mysteries of life and death,
For life brings tears that flow with so much wisdom;
Proclaiming, that nothing every really dies but only changes -
And in that change comes greater awareness of the Divine.

~Viola M. Jaynes

*Dedicated to Teri as she finds comfort in her loss.*

I wrote this prayer poem for Teri who is a regular commenter on Maxed out Mama’s site. She has just lost her husband. Please remember her and her family in your prayers

Until one has loved an animal, a part of one’s soul remains unawakened. ~Anatole France

^{Photograph by K. Alan Lewis}

Kal, one of my cyberfriends, just lost his dear dog of nine years. Beau had prostate cancer which, when discovered, had already spread through much of his body. Kal loved his friend too much to allow him to suffer with pain any more than he already had. Therefore, he made the very painful decision to put him to sleep. Kal’s heart is hurting right now. He will miss his friend terribly. Please remember him in your thoughts and prayers. Anyone that is a pet owner knows how much a part of our lives these animals can be.

I was always so moved when Kal wrote about his four-legged child and friend on his site. It was clear just how much they meant to each other. I am glad that Beau had such a good home, such a loving parent to love him and care for him. My thoughts and love are with Kal and Beau as I dedicate this poem to them both.

Man’s Best Friend

Animals! Oh what friends -
if we want them to be;
touched by their innocence -
we are forever changed.
It is a gift indescribable,
so precious, and unforgettable
as they quietly see into our hearts
and somehow understand.

Spoken words of exchange
are impossible, they say -
between man and this lovely
wide-eyed creature.
Yet, love’s language is always present -
if we just listen…
of acceptance and devotion
they so generously give away.

A best friend,
a faithful consoler,
and a true companion -
is the presence of such a comforting
and trusted friend.
Mysteriously, such pure love is possible
between them and us -
for when tears are shed at their loss -
we grasp this truth again.

Lovingly dedicated to Alan and Beau in memory of Beau’s happy life on this earth.

~Viola Jaynes
August 19, 2008

While we are mourning the loss of our friend, others are rejoicing to meet him behind the veil. ~ John Taylor

Yesterday, we had a death in our family. It was something that happened so fast that everyone is still in a state of shock and bewilderment. It is one of those events where people are wondering about the fairness of life. The sorrow and pain is felt deeply.

My husband’s aunt, a lovely lady, re-married a year ago to a man she had attended high school with, but didn’t know him well until she attended a more recent high school reunion. She was previously married and had two children in this marriage who adore her, but had been divorced for a long time. She worked herself through college and had become a teacher of Texas History and Special Education over the years in a local public school. She is wonderful with young people and has loved her job. At the end of this school year, she was looking forward to retirement with her new bridegroom having planned and dreamed to spend their remaining wonderful years together.

Her new husband had lost his wife about four years ago to cancer. They had three daughters together between 18 - 24 years of age. The family was very close, their marriage was strong, and the children flourished. The loss of their mother was very hard on them. Other family members, friends, and neighbors stepped in to help. They had also lost their grandmother last year, with whom they were all very close.

I remember the first time my husband’s aunt called me and told me that she had found this wonderful man. I could tell in her voice how happy she was, and I was so thrilled for her because I knew that she had not had an easy life. There is something so profoundly comforting when you meet someone that loves you and understands you for who and what you are. A man with whom you can share your life with.

Last month in April, the health problems began. Evidently, he had an abnormal heart beat for a long time, but it had never caused serious problems. Over the last Christmas vacation, the entire family went skiing, and I was told he had some problems getting his breath. Beginning in April, he was in an out of the hospital for testing. It began to look more serious than what anyone had expected. This past week, he had a “code blue” four times. Finally, the doctor and nurse began to cry as they could not bring him back during the last code blue. They felt so helpless because his heart simply wanted to stop.

Entering into the ICU unit, I found family and friends holding each other and crying. His three daughters were in a state of shock, and my husband’s aunt and children were wounded and broken by the death of her new husband. What I heard the loudest was how wonderful it was that those two had found each other, and “how was it possible that life could bring such a sudden death.” They were in the process of building a new home together and making plans for a wonderful retirement. It did not seem fair.

The other thing that was in the forefront of everyone’s mind was the three girls that were now left without their mother, father, and grandmother. How was it possible that these young girls would lose both their parents in a matter of four years? This also seemed so incredibly unbelievable and unfair.

As I looked at this man lying lifeless in that hospital bed, I realized just how large the spirit infills a human vessel. He seemed so frail and small without the spirit of life in him. I realized that the energy and life that makes us who we are on this earth is simply too great to be housed in a small body for too long. Our body is given as a gift to us to learn lessons in this lifetime, after which it is shed to once again return from where it came.

Embracing Death

Oh death, suddenly you come - but we fear you not.
You teach us awareness, each and every time.
You teach us humility and gratefulness.
Your presence brings new resolve into our lives -
to be kinder to all who have been entrusted to us.
To love even more deeply those who need us -
as well as those who want from us.

Oh death, you embrace us with a very cold chill -
leaving us to find warmth and comfort again.
You whisper realities into our ears that are not of this world -
that we might seek and seek,
and then finally find a deeper
and more secure place within ourselves.
Indeed, you are a part of the cycle of birth and dying -
of beginning and ending.
Yet, never the end to Light and Love -
for always it will continue on.

Let comfort come to those who are left behind.
Let light and hope illuminate the heart.
Let time bring its gentle healing kiss -
that tears may transform grief into laughter and joy again.
Let the beauty of life blossom
in each one who has loved him - whom you have taken.
Let them always remember him
and the joy and the love he so generously gave.

. . . Dedicated to the Memory of Barney Bolt . . .

Viola M. Jaynes
May 2008